


Alone

by sputniksweetheart



Category: The Hobbit (2012), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Loneliness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-20
Updated: 2013-04-20
Packaged: 2017-12-08 23:43:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/767463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sputniksweetheart/pseuds/sputniksweetheart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bilbo doesn't mind being alone. Being alone gives him comfort.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alone

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank you for my beta readers, [ **Ratha_FireSong** ](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Ratha_FireSong/) and [ **frostedshadow** ](http://archiveofourown.org/users/frostedshadow/) for helping me.

**a·lone**  /əˈlōn/[also ugh- **lohn** ]

adj.  having no one else present; on one's own.

 

Bilbo doesn’t mind being alone. He had his books, his comfortable armchair, and his beautiful garden. He kept telling himself its fine that Bag End was quiet and solitary. Bilbo scoffed, who needed adventure they are nothing but bothersome and those dwarves are loud and had no manners whatsoever.

Bilbo sighed loudly, he turned his head and stared at the contact that lay on the wooden table.  His hand reached out to touch the contact but he hesitated. Should he take thischance and go out to see the world? Fear was creeping up on him but he remembered what his mother had told him once when he was a wee lad.

 

“Bilbo, it’s all right to be afraid but do not let fear control your life.”

It had been decided. He grabbed the contact and rushed off to his chamber to pack up for his awaited adventure.

-

The Company sat around the blazing fire while Thorin, Balin and Gandalf sat away from the group, discussing private matters. Bilbo slowly sipped his soup and noticed Kili glance at him, fidget, and seemed to be hesitated.

“Mister Bilbo, can I ask you a question?” Kili asked curiously.

“Aren’t you asking me a question?” Bilbo raised his eyebrow and Kili’s eyes grew wide, “What is it you wish to ask?”

“Do you have a family waiting for you like a parent?” He blurted out.

Bilbo’s lip curved into a smile but there were no emotion shown in his eyes, “No. I don’t have anyone. My parents died long ago.”

As he tried to ignore the bitter memories of the day when his parent died in the Fell Winter. He had only been a tween, and had watched his father slowly died from unknown illness then his mother came upon the illness. It was a great tragedy for Bilbo and he mourned for years. Kili noticed something trigger Bilbo; he saw pain in Bilbo’s eyes.

“I’m sorry, Mister Bilbo.” Kili felt guilty about bringing up such horrible memories.

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault.” He shook his head and reassured Kili.

“Well, Mister Bilbo. Don’t worry anymore because you’re not alone.” He grinned. Trying to cheer Bilbo up he added, “We are a family now.”

“Thank you, Kili.” Bilbo was filled with joy and honour. For the first time in awhile, he didn’t felt alone. 

-

Bilbo sat by himself at the Beorn’s dinner table while the dwarves were in a deep sleep and Gandalf mentioned he had wizard business. Peacefully, he chewed the honey bread, dangled his leg, since he was quite peckish in the middle of the night and couldn’t sleep.

“Bilbo, what are you doing up so late? You should be in resting.”

Bilbo dropped his honey bread, he was startled of the rough voice spoken and turned his head around to see Thorin standing behind him.

“Thorin, you startled me!” He put his hand over his chest, to find that his heart was beating furiously.

Thorin walked towards Bilbo and crossed his arms under his chest, “Forgive me, Bilbo. I was worried, not seeing you asleep beside me.”

“I’m sorry for worring you. I was a bit peckish.” He smiled sheepishly.

Thorin grabbed the chair, sat next to Bilbo, “Always thinking of food first.” He shook his head.

Bilbo huffed, and continued eating his food, “The only reason you came looking for me was because you missed my warmth when I sleep next to you.” He swallowed down his food.

Thorin looked away and chuckled, “Yes, I dislike being alone when no one else is there to keep me warm.” His arms reached out, wrapped around Bilbo’s waist.  Bilbo squeaked and dropped the honey bread on the floor when Thorin pulled him into his lap.

“Thorin!” Bilbo lightly slapped Thorin’s arm and was upset about his food.

“Come to bed, Halfling.” Thorin whispered huskily to his ear.

“Fine.”

-

Thorin’s eyes were wide open; his vivid blue eyes were now dull and lifeless. There were cuts and bruises on his face, his mouth was slightly open, and blood oozed the corner of his lip He was nothing but an empty shell. It was unfair; he was supposed be crowned as a king and lived a long happy life with his nephews. He didn’t want to end like this.

Bilbo tightly clenched his hand, afraid Thorin would slip out of his grasp. He let out a sob, struggled to breathe, and couldn’t stopped the tears from falling down his cheeks. It was his fault and now, he must deal the consequence and suffer it.

Someone behind him gripped his shoulder, “Lad, you have to let go. He’s gone.”

The truth hurts.

-

In the quiet Bag End, Bilbo was sitting on his brown armchair and sipping his lukewarm tea. It was quiet, a little too quiet for his taste. It was an odd feeling that something he was so used to and now, he felt uncomfortable with the silence that surrounded him.

It finally hit him.

His vision blurred; the tears streamed down his face, and he clutched the cup too tightly until his knuckles turned white. He just laughed, and laughed hysterically.

And, he realized, that he was alone once again.


End file.
